My first Thanksgiving was really rough.
It was my first big holiday traveling and visiting family.
I had lots of sobriety under my belt. Almost 9 months. Still I felt wobbly, shaky, and fragile.
I drank a lot with my family. I wasn’t sure what to do without it. Everyone in my family drinks, but most did not drink as much as me. Some of my family drank more than usual when I was around, because I could be kind of a drink pusher. Just one more. One more.
This first Thanksgiving I didn’t want anyone to act differently around me. I didn’t want my sobriety to be weird. I wanted to be cool, confident, and simply fly under the radar.
This was an impossible desire. I wasn’t cool or confident. I have big energy and have never been able to fly under the radar.
My family saw my self diagnosed alcohol problem and they were trying to learn more about my newfound sobriety. I didn’t have words for it....
At four years sober, looking back I can see how my whole life revolved around alcohol.
St. Paddy’s Day is, of course, a huge drinking holiday. All I needed in the past was alcohol to make it a success.
So much so, that it was my first night out just 6 weeks after my first daughter was born 17 years ago.
On March 17, 2005 I got out of my nursing pajamas and into my kelly green to hit up an Irish pub with a friend while hubs stayed home alone with the baby for the first time ever.
I loved it.
I was impressed with my hot mom body (don’t hate me).
I had a skinny waist, brand new boobs, and insatiable desire for a night out of the house. I was ready to hit the scene and show it all off.
I was thrilled when the opportunity spontaneously arose. I leapt into that pub, chugged my green beer, and announced to everyone that I was (gasp!) a new mom.
I was just begging for attention, and on an absolute...
This year, more than ever perhaps, the negative effects of consuming too much alcohol are coming to light.
A study by JAMA Network found heavy drinking among women is up 41% from 2019 - 2020. Alcohol related deaths have also increased. Excessive drinking increases one’s risk for anxiety, depression, suicide, seven different types of cancer, stroke, and heart disease.
Alcohol has been an easy “go to” holiday gift for business contacts, neighbors, teachers, and hosts.
Enjoy these healthier alternatives to gifting this holiday season.
Why not treat someone special to some pampering? Bath bombs, face masks, sugar scrubs, and more. The nudge for time alone will feel like a complete luxury for anyone who’s been wearing all the hats this year. Luxurious spa products are a great step in the right direction.
Tis’ the season for fuzzy socks, cozy pajamas, and soft blankets. You can find these items in any...
The holidays can feel stressful.
This year, perhaps even more so, with the current state of the pandemic.
You may be feeling health concerns, financial fears, and decreased mental health.
There's a general consensus that times are tough and alcohol helps.
Drinking is promoted as a way to cope with the madness.
The “at least there’s wine” mentality is harmful to many.
Alcohol actually adds to the exhaustion, anxious feelings, and regrets that you may already be feeling.
Here’s a few tips for managing the holidays in healthy ways:
1- Acknowledge the loss.
The holidays may not feel like "The Most Wonderful Time of Year", if you are missing someone you love. Grief is amplified during the holiday season. Whether you are missing someone you are not getting together with this year, or missing someone who has passed, this can be a time of deep sadness. Allow yourself to move through your feelings. Give yourself the space you need to cry,...
Before you start with the wine jokes for Mother’s Day.
Wine has been sold to women as the cure for parenting stress, and it’s a lie.
I know because I tried it.
I wanted relief during the nightly dinner time, bath time, bedtime routine.
I wanted something to take the edge off of me, being me.
I was anxious that our house was never clean enough for me.
I was worried that I was never good enough for my kids.
I was trying to keep up parenting and working.
I was always overwhelmed.
Often my schedule required me to be in two places at once.
I was not able to manage this impossible feat.
My attempts caused me so much stress.
That magic wine elixir did work at first.
It took the edge off.
It soothed my nerves and made me feel like everything was ok.
I started to look forward to my first evening sip.
Then, I started to depend on it.
Then, I started to panic when there was not enough of it.