My Rock Bottom Didn't Make Me Quit
Hi Friend,
Transitions are hard.
My firstborn has always known this. As a toddler, she fell apart every single day going from daycare to home. She cried when her college semester ended. She cried when we left Maui. And right now, she's crying because she's going back to school.
I get it. She loves it all. It's all hard to say goodbye to.
And honestly? I feel it too. After a 12-hour travel day home from Maui and a 5-hour time difference, let me tell you, I felt that transition in my bones.
You know when you win a goldfish at the carnival and they tell you not to dump it straight into the new tank? You float the plastic bag of old water in the new water and let it rest there a while. You let it marinate before you open the bag.
I'm exactly the same. When I land somewhere new, I have to settle into the new air, the smells, the sounds, and the energy. A shower is my number one way to ground myself in a new place—partly to rinse the travel germs off, partly for the healing reset that water always gives me. It's like floating my own little bag of goldfish water into the new tank.
I woke up at 11 a.m. on my first morning back home. LOL. Love that for me.
After much coffee on an empty stomach (the way I love it), I made two hard eggs, sprinkled them with furikake, and laid them on whole wheat sourdough. I smoothed a floral tablecloth over the patio table, poured a Gruvi mimosa, and just... marinated in my neighborhood air.
It was a glorious transition. I'm back in the home waters.
And it got me thinking about how much I loved that entire trip, which basically started on the anniversary of my rock bottom moment.
Here's the thing about my rock bottom: it didn't look like the movies. My lowest moment was an embarrassing, broad-daylight drunkenness on Memorial Day—after a weekend of binge drinking (like everyone else) on top of my anxiety meds. I scared my family. I still consider it the lowest point I ever hit.
And I didn't quit drinking for another eight months.
I tell you that because I know how many of us are waiting for some dramatic, undeniable sign before we're "allowed" to change. I had mine, and I still kept going. You don't need a worse story than the one you already have.
It got me thinking about the whole summer ahead, with a running list of ideas already saved: where to go, what to do, who to do it with.
And now alcohol has nothing to do with any of it. The absence of alcohol also has nothing to do with it. Alcohol is just... nothing to me now.
That took time.
When I first quit drinking, I tried to keep my whole life the same and just quietly not drink on the side. That didn't work. So I tried to recreate my life sober—same activities, same thinking, new people, no alcohol. That didn't really work either.
So I stopped trying to edit the old version of me. I got to know who I actually am now, and I became someone new.
This new person isn't measuring herself against the old one. She's not trying to prove anything. She's just living her life, finding joy, getting to know herself, and letting all the feelings come. When things are hard — and they are — I take care of myself now instead of abandoning myself. I go straight toward the pain. It's been so much more effective than the workaround of alcohol, which never solved a single thing for me and just became its own problem.
This spring, the women in my community did this work together: daily audio lessons, weekly yoga nidra intention-setting, small-group connection in pods, and bigger live gatherings each week (with replays), some led by the Insiders themselves.
At the end of May, I asked them, "Who are you becoming?"
A few of their answers:
"I am becoming more me!"
"I am becoming more clear, confident, and present for myself and my family."
"I'm becoming more confident and grounded in my authentic self."
"A confident woman who is happy today."
"I am becoming quietly confident and, for the first time in a long while, I'm curious to see how the future unfolds."
"I am becoming more aware of my emotions."
"I am becoming the best version of me."
"I'm becoming older, hopefully wiser."
Yes, drinking was fun sometimes. I'm not going to pretend otherwise.
But have you ever made brunch just for yourself? Reached for the special Japanese seasoning, poured a Gruvi mocktail, smoothed a floral tablecloth over the patio table, and ate breakfast alone in the morning sun—with nowhere to be and no fog in your head after a hangover-guilt-free vacation?
Priceless. And it never asks you to apologize the next morning.
That's the feeling behind a free live workshop I'm hosting on the summer solstice:
Soak Up Summer, Skip the Hangover: How to Have an Aligned, Creative Summer, Free From Worrying About Drinking Too Much
📅 Sunday, June 21, 2026 · 7 p.m. - 8 p.m. CST · Live on Zoom · Free
This isn't about labels. You don't have to call yourself anything, quit anything, or have a rock-bottom story. Whether you want to stop, slow down, or just stop worrying about it, you're welcome. Years alcohol-free, brand new, or simply curious: every stage belongs in this room.
We'll build a whole summer around the five things alcohol only pretends to give you—freedom, pleasure, confidence, health, and purpose—with 22 deliciously specific ideas to steal (farmers market crawls, sunrise, picnics at sunset, the best dress you actually wear, a fancy alcohol-free cocktail hour, and getting into a body of water just because).
Come feel good in your mind, body, and soul this summer. Save your seat — it's free.
XO!
Heather
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