Dry July: 31 Days as the Woman of Your Dreams
Hi friend,
Dry July starts Wednesday, and this year, we're not white-knuckling it. We're playing a character. More on that in a minute. But first, the moment that made me tear up this week.
The Win That Got Me This Week
I get goosebumps every time these land in my inbox.
One of my previous long-term 1:1 clients texted me this week:
"2,000 days. You got me sober."
I texted back, "You got yourself sober—I had the honor of witnessing it."
Two thousand days. That's not a streak; that's a whole new life. And what makes it land even harder is everything she's carried to get here. She lost her husband years ago and has raised her kids—children with special needs—on her own ever since. Somewhere in the middle of all of it, she came to understand she's neurodivergent herself, which reframed a lifetime of feeling like she was doing everything the hard way.
She didn't get sober in calm waters. She got sober in the storm—through grief, through caregiving that never clocks out, and through seasons most people would call reason enough to pour a drink. And she chose to be clear-headed anyway. Not because it was easy, but because her kids deserve all of her, and because she finally decided she deserves all of her, too. For 2,000 days, she's been creating her life on purpose.
If you're thinking, "I don't have a "win"—you opened this. You're still here. That counts.
The Sober Scavenger Hunt
One of our members is heading to a country music festival—so we flipped it into a scavenger hunt: collect the good things you only notice clear-headed. The exact moment a whole crowd sings the same line back to the band. A stranger's killer boots—and actually remembering them tomorrow. The sky turns gold right as the headliner walks out. Remembering a new name. The drive home, fully present. Waking up with no fog, no dread.
We're playing all month inside the community, sharing our finds on the hunt board.
This Week Inside the Community
Daily check-in thread. Come as you are.
Sunday Yoga Nidra Recording: "I Trust Myself In the Real World"
Monday Book Club with Host Deb—"99 Ways to Not be a Grumpy Old Woman"
Thursday Host Heather—Sober Summer Series and Dry July Kickoff - Set your intention with us.
Come live, cameras on or off. Can't make it live? The replays are always waiting for you.
Not an Insider? Start your free week and play along.
Dry July: 31 Days as the Woman of Your Dreams
Here's the insight speaking to me this week: What if you're not struggling to stay sober because you're weak but because the life you want doesn't quite fit the version of you still living inside you?
We're trained to ask, "What's the worst that could happen?" Forget that. What's the best that could happen if you became the woman of your dreams?
I first ran this alter ego exercise inside my business mastermind, and it cracked me open so completely that I knew I had to bring it here, to us. Because this isn't really about business or sobriety. It's about finding the woman you dream of being, becoming her, and letting her feel safe enough to finally live inside you out loud.
Here's what I know for sure: you can't become a woman you've never let yourself imagine. She has to exist in your mind before she can exist in your life. But dreams don't come true in the dark; we have to picture them in vivid detail and then speak them into existence. First you imagine her. Then you name her. Then, one borrowed choice at a time, you become her.
It works for anything: sobriety, health, your art, and your career. When I did it for my business, I had to retrain myself out of my old corporate-sales brain. My first answer was more revenue, faster growth, and better KPIs. But the more I chased MORE, the more I realized it was never my goal.
So who showed up? A woman who hustles less and finds her flow. A woman who dedicates space for her writing. Someone who grows and goes deeper with the people already alongside her instead of chasing the next one. A woman who trusts herself. Someone who's done with comparisons. In July, she wakes up with a plan and knows when to shut down at the end of the day (or early afternoon); she shows up to her writing class and sees that this, right now, is the dream coming true. She's happy, content, and enough right now, exactly as is.
I'd never hand you something I haven't done myself, so I went first. Now it's your turn.
The 4 steps:
- Name her. Write a page as the woman of your dreams. Ask: What's the best that could happen?
- Borrow one thing daily. Pick one thing she'd do. And do it.
- Track it. Mark each day you showed up as her.
- Reply to this email and tell me about her. I read every single response.
Also This Week: Let's Talk About THC
"I quit drinking, but I have started to use weed more." I hear it constantly, and there's so much shame around it. The new blog cuts through the noise on "California sober," with zero judgment either way.
Growth isn't about perfection. It's about connection—and you don't have to do this alone. See you inside.
Fall in love with your life.
Heather
(reformed wine-o'clock enthusiast, midlife rebel, dreamer, and your sober cheerleader always doing high kicks in your corner)
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